As an immigrant or someone who grows up in an immigrant family, “losing face” has been an unspoken worry. To overcome this, you push yourself to the very extreme. It starts from your parents’ or family’s expectations. You grin and bear all the suffering to meet the goals. You gradually internalize this generational value and constantly set the bar higher to excel. We have a term for this - Imposter Syndrome.

In Asian cultures, it is not encouraged to express your emotions and feelings. We rarely have a chance to go deep with our feelings and emotional needs. Does it sound familiar to you?

• “Stop crying” is a common response because they don’t know how to comfort you.  

• “Don’t think about it” implies that the negative feelings would not affect you.

This does not only impact your own individual mental well-being but is also deeply rooted in the interpersonal relationship. 

• “This is not good enough. You need to work harder”. Parents focus on picking on you because they think they are helping you grow.

• “Men don’t cry” and “act like a lady” limit your way of emotional expression based on gender stereotypes.

You try hard to be an American while keeping good Asian traits/traditions. Your parents tell you to keep your head down. Your surrounding environment tells you to speak up for yourself. One culture tells you to improve what you are lacking while the other culture tells you your self-worth is inherent. Your mixed culture brings you very mixed feelings and makes you wonder which cultures you should lean toward. There is a token to balance your blended cultural background.

I truly believe that exposing ourselves to one more culture helps us learn about the world from a different perspective. Just like being able to use another language, it is more than your understanding the words and the grammar but your mindset shifting. 

This is not the time to compare one culture to another. It is time to recognize how mixed cultures teach, shape, nurture, and challenge us.

Making changes does not mean you need to cut off your Asian bond. You do not have to undergo this process alone. As an insider, I help you identify cultural struggles. As a professional with an outside perspective, I will teach you to 

1. Know more about your emotional regulation and stress coping; 

2. Develop your family culture stories -narrative development; 

3. And live in a balanced union. 

There is a chance you will eventually learn the beauty within you and appreciate your growth and resilience.

Together, we can break through self-doubt and imposter syndrome. There is a chance to embrace our resilience and unlock our full potential. seize this opportunity to embrace the power of therapy, paving the way for positive change and a brighter future.